{WARNING: Sappy and Overly-Romantic}

I'm so tired.
I'm so tired of all of this.

Every time I start to feel whole again on my own,
Every time I stop feeling like I'm missing a part of myself,
Every time I finally give up,
that's when it hits me.

You hit me.

And then it starts all over again.
The pain.
The sadness.
The nostalgia, so bitter-sweet.

I find myself laying on the bathroom floor at 2 AM.
All I want is you.
And I know you want me too.
I remember that day... that wonderful moment in time.
I close my eyes and I picture myself in your arms.

You're holding me to your chest.
Cradling me in your arms, you look deeply into my eyes.
Your beautiful brown eyes... You give me that look, that look of deepest longing.... and...

I wouldn't dare say it.

I start to tear up, my face gets hot.
I don't look away.
You whisper "no... don't be sad"
"I-- I'm not-- I--"
I look away.
The tears are streaming down my face.
You wipe my tears away so carefully, so lovingly.
I look back into those deep, carmel brown eyes.

There's that look again.
And you're kissing me.
I kiss back, my hands tangled in your messy hair.
I'm lost in that moment,
perceiving nothing but our lips moving together,
for a moment I'm exactly where I belong.

I begin to cry.
I'm back on the bathroom floor.
Phone in my hand, recent call: 2 hours, 38 minutes, 53 seconds.
Defeated.

I will never forget.
I refuse to give up.